The night we were admitted to the oncology floor I felt like I was sleep walking. In my mind I thought there had to be a mistake  The lab must have confused my daughters blood with someone else. I was in complete denial.

My daughter had never been sick. What had I done wrong? How could my beautiful little girl have cancer? As I sat outside of her room I couldn’t help but think why us? My mind was plagued with anger, fear and denial. I wiped my tears and decided that I would not allow this diagnosis to bring me down. Now more than ever, Ariana needed me to be strong, positive and the best advocate for her well being. Growing up I would always avoid the St. Jude commercials  because the cancer patients looked so ill and sad. I guess it was my way of avoiding something that did not affect me. It was time for me to face my fears in the flesh. The oncology floor is always full and the patients range from in patient chemo to taking their last breath. The first three days I found myself going to the restroom and just crying. I cried for the injustice that is Cancer. These beautiful children robbed from living. Now my daughter was one of these kids. The highlight of their days inpatient is playing in a room while plugged to their IV and or chemo. If they have a fever they are considered contagious and put in isolation. Isolation means the patient can not leave the room until the doctor clears them. Ariana sat at the window seal for days just looking out at the people going into the local grocery store.

Ariana was admitted on a Friday we would not speak to the oncologist until Monday but the fellow on call would drop by to have us sign paperwork. The fellow was quite the talker and he kept assuring me that the labs were Ariana’s and we needed to sign a consent form for transfusions, bone marrow and lumbar puncture biopsies. I had heard so many horror stories of transfusions gone wrong that I highly debated signing that form. Today, I am so thankful I did. Upon signing those documents Ari was scheduled to go into the OR Tuesday. The following evening her labs showed she had 9 platelets and she needed an immediate transfusion. Traditionally, the patient will exhibit allergic symptoms within the first 30 minutes of the transfusion. The nurse stayed in the room with us well past the 30 minutes and Ariana was doing great. It was 1am and I had not slept in three days and I decided to sit down on the couch and close my eyes for a little bit. The transfusion was 15 minutes from finishing when Ramon went and looked at Ariana and she was extremely swollen and red he hit the nurse button and I immediately jumped out of my chair and ran out to see if the nurse was at his station. He was no where to be found and as I ran into the room I saw the monitors registering her beats at 215/minute and she was throwing up all over the bed. The nurse came from the room next door, turned off the transfusion and hit the code blue button. Within seconds a team of 10 nurses and 2 doctors ran in. Ariana had had a terrible delayed allergic reaction to the transfusion. We learned that night that Ariana is allergic to platelets and blood products and has to be heavily pre-medicated. When the nurse took her temperature she had a fever of 104.7. This fever would last 5 consecutive days.